È Arrivata – The End of the Experiment, Part I

As we walked through Rome’s international airport towards our gate earlier today, an arrival from America was entering the terminal. A young couple caught my attention. Obviously travel weary but happy, the young man broke out in a grin that encapsulated it well as he let out an exuberant “We’re here!!”

How many times Marty and I have exclaimed the same over the almost 20 years we’ve traveled to Italy – always a thrill to set foot on Italian soil, to feel the sheer joy of being back.

This time, arrival held this, of course, but with a different perspective. The realization of having almost three months awaiting us, of settling in and discovering life in a mock living-here way, was a different sort of joy. Admittedly, there was a little apprehension to go with it…would this incredible country loose part of its appeal (is the honeymoon over?), would we become overtly homesick, would we have any regrets? Those thoughts were minor players, however, to the overriding excitement and joy of having this length of time, of being able to luxuriate in the daily culture, explore at will, and just “be” Italian-style.

It was all of that; the good parts, however, superseded the apprehensive parts which were minor, if at all. There’s always an element of missing your family and friends, missing your norms, and we did experience all of that as part of the mix. I’d worry about us if we didn’t! But the overall take on this initial experiment was positive – we have no regrets (other than the extra pounds) and are completely content that we did this.

The minutiae I can comprehend (and I’m being generous with myself) about String Theory is the concept of Parallel Universes. The past almost three months feel like this, as if we’ve stepped into some twilight zone of the best kind and lived la dolce vita each day. Up until near midnight many a night, leisurely awakening as we eased the sunlight in through cracked wooden shutters became the norm. Birdsong through open windows serenaded the morning as moka pot coffee hit the spot. Launching on plans for where to explore that day, or who we’d be visiting, or what place should lunch or dinner include made up many a day. Even the more mundane tasks such as grocery shopping or the weekly visit to the lavanderia were small adventures all on their own.

Most days included a passeggiata through town and up and around the Rocca, the extra reward of an aperativo to follow. Faces and names became familiar with ciao or buon giorno or buona sera warmly exchanged.

We watched the earliest hints of spring ease into full-blown glory. Tiny buds just beginning to appear on trees became tender leaflets that finally reached full summer spread. Dreamily elegant wisteria graced porticos and walls until giving way to the tiny white stars of abundant jasmine that headily perfumed the air. What pleasure to watch cherry trees wearing ruffled white flowers gradually drop their blossoms as tiny cherry sprouts took over. The week or so before we departed, the same trees were now weighted with ruby colored fruit clusters ready for picking. Our numerous drives through the exquisite mountain valleys surrounding Spoleto made us privy audience as we observed gentle spring colors of lime green, chartreuse, and soft yellow-green quickly transition to the assured greens of summer. What an honor to behold all of these pleasures.

Did we reach any hypothetical bottom line over these 80 some-odd days? Are there data points that have jelled to help us make decisions about how the future might look? The quick answer is that for now, we feel that our life situation is best suited to continue with “The Schengen Shuffle” – 90 days in the USA, 90 days in Italy (or any other Schengen country). Will that decision remain our final answer in the months and years ahead, should we be blessed with many more? Who knows. But for now, with our family structure as it is, with our home and our get-away cabin on the Frio River, with the uncertainty of the world, with still figuring out how our retired life expenditure falls out, and other considerations, going slow and easy seems to suit us both.

Does that mean jumping in feet first with no looking back is a bad idea for those considering that as their expat option? Absolutely not! We admire those who have had the certainty to do that or are working towards this option. We’ve met several expats on this trip who have chucked it all with no regret. We need to move more cautiously, however, and we’re okay with that.

All that said, our current plan is to return to Spoleto in September – tickets already bought, car rented, apartment secured. This will be a two month adventure due to holidays. We discussed ad nauseam perhaps spending one month in the deep south (Sicily, Sardinia, or Puglia) and another in the far north, but our hearts kept calling us back to Spoleto. That doesn’t negate side trips to these areas next time around, though!

Another data point we’re curious to gather is how we’ll feel upon our return. We will be happy to be home, but will that so-familiar yearning for Italy return as quickly as it usually does? Or will we be happy to return but not with the burning desire that is usually present? We also need time in our little cabin; has it served its purpose for the working phase of our lives, and it’s now time to relinquish? Many questions haunt us still!

In the meantime, we will land tonight in Texas, readjust to the heat, devour a huge plate of Mexican food the following day, attend to details of mail, appointments, a couple of minor catastrophes with the house, and life as we left it.

One thing is for certain, though — any of these scenarios really does quality as the sweet life, and for that we are ever grateful!